Tag Archives: comedy

That Time I Went To An AA Meeting and More Comedy

2 Jun

Hi Everyone! It’s been awhile…I’m feeling guilty about my absence from the blogging world. I haven’t been eating popcorn watching Netflix this whole time I have just been busy with my newest addiction to stand up comedy and preparing for my cousin’s upcoming wedding. (The bachelorette party put me out of commission for about 5 days. My brain has slowly started to come back to me.)

Also, I did my very first REAL LIVE SHOW on Friday! Whoohoo! I got to perform with Rain Pryor, the daughter of legendary comedian, Richard Pryor. What a fun time it was and I got my dad to video tape the whole thing for you. Please note at the end when an elderly man gives me the middle finger…nothing like pissing off a senior citizen to start off your comedy career.

 

On another note, I am a guest writer for Can I Get Another Bottle Of Whine today! It’s all about the time I went to my first AA Meeting. Make sure you check it out here and don’t forget to follow Kate, she is a hilarious blogger that has a special talent for Twitter.

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Blogging will commence shortly….stay tuned.

That Girl Ryan Does Stand Up Comedy

21 Mar

Here it is…my comedy routine!

I’m an inpatient bastard and couldn’t wait any longer to receive the professional taping of my routine, so I’m posting the footage one of my fans (aka my dad) captured on the night of the show.

This is the entire routine minus the last 3 seconds…it’s just missing 4 words.

Enjoy!

What did you think!?

FYI: I Didn’t Die

14 Mar

Hello? Is anyone still out there?

It’s me, That Girl Ryan.

I wanted to check in and let you know that I did not die or lose my hands, I just abandoned my blog for 3 weeks.

Terrible, I know but I did upload my NEW blog logo!!! Don’t you love it?!

My unrealistic expectations took me in a different direction once again to…Stand-UP Comedy Class.

Making an asshole of myself online wasn’t enough, I needed to get on stage and do it in person.  Let me tell you, it’s harder than it looks.

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20140314-161217.jpgLook at me trying to be cool

Next week is my official “graduation show” where I get to do my whole bit in front of a real audience – trashy New Jersey locals – but still, even trashy NJ locals can be an intimidating bunch.

I wanted to share some things I discovered about the world of comedy…

1. Male comedians are perverts/horn dogs…can’t help but love them

I won’t go into detail but I will say this…

Ladies, if you are single and want to date a male comedian, take my advice and do not shave, do not wax the “area”. There is a group of men out there who will fully appreciate you as a woman in her natural state; pubes and all.

I haven’t seen anything quite like it…

2. The uglier and older you are, the more you get away with…it’s not fair

This is the first time in my life I wish I was born fat, ugly and funny because then I’d get away with saying anything…like newborns are ugly and look like old men. For some reason, that line just doesn’t have the same effect as if an older, grey haired, overweight lady said it.

Ugh.

3. It’s hard to write comedy material

I spent the last three days thinking up different ways I could explain the benefits of being a Tranny

I missed a meeting at work because I was practicing my voice impression for Steve Urkel

I spent 45 minutes searching all the synonymous for VAGINA

WTF has my life become?

4. You become a narcissistic

I’m ready to bitch slap myself

5. You are not as funny as you think you are

Like that time I went to an open mic and nobody laughed at my jokes…Most awkward 5 minutes of my life.

6. Stage fright gets re-defined

Flight or Fight has become…Flight, Fight and piss your pants

Wish Me Luck this week…I will return back to my blog soon!

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